Parenting After an Affair
A marriage broken apart by an affair can lead to years of pain and questions that there may not be any answers to. The future of your marriage and the life that you have known is in peril, but your biggest concern may be the future of your children, and rightfully so. With most marriages ending in divorce when infidelity is involved, focusing on co-parenting for the well-being of your children will be difficult to do, but it is ultimately the best choice to make.
If your spouse had an affair, you may feel that because of their poor decision, they should not have custody of your children, nor should the person they had the affair with. In a court of law, extramarital affairs and anything your spouse had done outside of their interaction with your children will not affect a judge’s decision of who will gain custody. This is most likely the same decision that will be made should you want the other person out of your child’s lives as well. In court, the only exception that will be made is if your spouse put your children in danger or made decisions that led to your children being in danger It is rare for a judge to side with the parent who had been cheated on solely for infidelity.
Communicating with each other and working together to make the changes in your child’s life easier to manage is the best decision. A divorce or an affair will upend everything your children have known, and it is the parents’ responsibility to make sure they are taken cared for.
- Forgiveness: One of the hardest things you will have to do following an affair is to forgive the other person, but it is also a necessity for your mental health and that of your child. You do not have to act like nothing happened but holding on to the grudge will be noticed by your child and is emotionally unhealthy for an already unfortunate situation.
- Work Together: As stated above, both parents must work together for the betterment of their children, regardless of how they feel about each other and what had happened in the past. This also means the transition your child must make will be difficult for them, and both parents working together will make it easier for them.
- Take Your Time: Any major changes in the family dynamic requires care and plenty of time for everyone involved. Try to acknowledge that mistakes had been made and that the healing process will take time, especially for your child. Give yourself the space to spend extra time with your child and listen to their needs, do not argue in front of them, and try to keep your spouse’s behavior out of the conversation. If both parents are going to try to work together for their children, it is best to try to be an example of strength and positivity in their time of need.
South Jersey Divorce Lawyers at the Burnham Law Group, LLC Help Clients with Custody Arrangements
If you and your spouse are thinking about filing for a divorce, call the South Jersey divorce lawyers at the Burnham Law Group, LLC right away. Our experienced and knowledgeable lawyers will help you work through the process and answer the questions you have. Call us today at 856-751-5505 or fill out our online form for a free consultation. Located in Marlton and Somers Point, New Jersey, we serve clients throughout South Jersey, including Camden County, Burlington County, and Atlantic County.